so ready

Okay I can't keep doing this to myself. I am lazy and eating badly and I'd imagine I gained weight/inches. It's 4 pm and I've had 3 bowls of crunch berries and a salad. I'm just bored. I need to get off my ass and clean the house but I haven't yet. I finished a book I was reading and I'm chatting to my friend and harrassed J via text message which is insanely fun to do but doesn't assist in cleaning the house or losing weight. I think I suffer without someone to say 'hey get off your ass and do what needs done.' I'm just so tired of this cycle.

I skipped my weigh in/measuring on Monday and I said it was due to the failure of the last few weeks with my foot injury and my sinus infection and this and that but really I think I was giving up. I've ordered shoes and will be starting the C25k soon so I think that'll be a boost. Today I'm going to try the wii fit Gold's Gym cardio workout.

I just feel like an idiot for giving up but not even being willing to admit it to myself...I'm over it now and ready to get on with it

excited

So I am going to order my new running shoes tomorrow and should have them next week so I can start my C25k. I am looking forward to it so much. I'll also be doing the Wii Fit Gold's Gym game that I checked out from the library to try it out. I wouldn't want to buy it if it's junk.

Anyway, things have been horrid here in terms of getting my exercise in. I have continued to eat well and still have not had pop in over a month which is the best thing to me. I drink water and occasional glasses of milk. I have had a few sips of pop in desperation but they were disgusting. I have also cut chips out again and this time I'm thinking of doing that more permanently. They are a horrid weakness for me and I just need to give them up.

Earlier this week I signed up for a team leader kit from the local Making Strides for Breast Cancer walk which will be October 11. Myself and a few others have made this plan together but I will do it alone if necessary. I plan to try to run the whole thing but would be happy to run at least half.

I really need to update my vlog but haven't had time and for a couple days didn't have much of a voice. I'll try to do that in the next few days.

Blog Swap

I've never done this before but here we go.

I have recently befriended a couple of ladies who blog/twitter together via twitter. They are on the weight loss journey with me and they asked if anyone would be interested in blog swapping. I, of course, decided to offer my own blog up and went about picking what I'd want to share from them. I had a really hard time because they are both brilliant writers. Find out for yourself by follwing their twitter feed at @fabfatties. Please check out and follow their blog as well at http://weightlosswiththefabulousfatties.wordpress.com I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

I AM DOING THIS FOR ME

"When you begin living your life fully from the deepest place within you and loving who you are, all things will change for the better.” – Gena Livings just posted this on Twitter. She seriously has the best posts, if you are not following her you should, they always motivate and inspire me.



I love this! I believe that I need to learn to love myself enough to make healthy choices for me. In other words I shouldn’t have the mind set that I need to exercise or eat healthy so I can by thin and feel good about myself, but I need to feel good enough about myself to exercise and eat right.

I am setting some goals for the week to help me achieve this mind set:

I am going to go to bed early enough to get a full 8 hours of sleep. (This one is going to be the toughest!)
I am going to get out of bed by 6:30 so I can exercise in the morning.
I am going to take the time to prepare lunch/snacks to take to work.
I am going to take time to appreciate the beauty of the outdoors.
I am going to breath deep full breaths and accept life as it is each day, enjoying each moment.
Wow, I already feel more peace. Lately my life has been crazy busy stress and each moment is jam packed with 50+ things to do. Life is not about running the fastest or accomplishing the most each day. It is about enjoying each moment, appreciating every oppurtunity presented to you and making the most of it. This is what I am working on this week. I know I have had a caotic energy lately and that is going to shift into an energy of serenity and peace. Big things are happening in my life right now and I am so excited… I just need to remember to breath and take time to take care of myself.

It feels so good to put it out there that I am taking care of myself because I derserve it… so much better than I want to lose weight because I am soo fat!

Okay… I gotta get to bed because I have 5 minutes to make my goal! (Breahting and not stressing about my goal… or at least trying!)

walking

So any time I walk more than about 1/2 mile my ankle begins to hurt. I have therefore decided to postpone restarting the walk challenge until Monday which will push my dates back for starting/finishing the couch to 5k by 1 week. That is okay though. I am not going to be hard on myself. I will be ordering my first pair of running shoes this weekend and chose these: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00186SVLK/ref=twister_dp_update?ie=UTF8&childASIN=B00186WMNI

I am very much looking forward to beginning this. I feel like when I start this I will truly be taking charge of my life for the first time ever.

I've left sparkpeople because I felt overwhelmed by all the things I had bookmarked. I was going to sparkpeople, thecarrot, neversaydiet, fitday (that's just a few)...I've cut all those down to fitday just for tracking purposes. There is an upcoming 4 week challenge on neversaydiet but they will email those and I may not do it. I think I have a good plan and really think if I continue to overload myself with information and advice from multiple sources it will only serve to deter me and I'll lose sight of the goal and quit AGAIN. I can't afford to do that to myself.

get off that big thing and MOVE

It's been a bit since I've blogged. Two weeks ago tomorrow I hurt myself...I either stubbed my foot on the chair or hurt it doing WATP, either way I'm not sure. I ended up being placed in an air cast and unable to comfortably move around I just sat. I am now out of the air cast but still a little bit tender. I am going to get back to it today. I have to start somewhere and even if it hurts I can always stop when it's uncomfortable. My shoes finally fit again so that's a good sign.

I gained back a couple pounds and a few inches which may be water weight but we'll see. I'm not stressing too much about it. I really expected it. I tried to do some type of arm and ab workouts but my heart wasn't in it. If I wasn't going to break a sweat it just didn't feel worth it to me. I wouldn't say I was depressed about it but I wasn't giving my all to it. I'm just ready for the journey to be over. I know I can't skip over the journey but it's hard not to get completely frustrated by all the work I've put in with very little result. Yes I have lost a ton of inches but where.

So here is my plan. Today I start back to my 6 week walk away the pounds challenge. The challenge calls for 64 miles walked in 6 weeks. I am upping that to challenge myself to 70-75 miles and at least a weight loss of 10 pounds in that time. I will probably throw in a couple of water aerobic classes. Six weeks from yesterday, which would be June 15, I WILL start my Couch to 5K training. That would have me running during the hottest period of the summer and I think that would end like August 17th. I can always run in the evenings when the weather is a bit cooler anyway. I'm not going to give up because it will be hot.

My initial weight goal is 200 pounds, at which time I will buy a real webcam so I can play in Stickam with the YT crowd if they can handle my awesomeness. According to where I am now, 227.1, I should hit that around August 8th which is also the date I have to go to a wedding so I can hopefully wear a really cute summer dress to go. I should also hit my final goal around Valentine's day. I promise I will not promptly pig out on chocolate and gain 5 pounds. I'm not a chocolate fan anyway. It's Easter and Marshmallow Peeps that are my candy weakness.