guess what?

I don't want to blog today and you can't make me.

A smartass 11 year old just pointed out to me that posting this means I blogged...he's grounded and I'm going to lock him in the dungeon for a week. (please don't call child services...I promise to feed him)

challenging myself AGAIN

Okay so this week I decided to challenge myself to cut all caffeine out entirely by drinking only water. I then modified that to include 1 cup of milk with dinner and then I thought hot tea is relaxing to me so I modified it to include 1 cup of hot tea per day. Yesterday I only had 1 cup of hot tea with 1 tsp of sugar and 1/2 cup of milk along with about 1/2 gallon of water with lemon juice to prevent retention. Today I made it until 4 when I needed the tea to prevent falling over. I'm so caffeine addicted that it woke up me almost instantly. Still drinking water but added a flavor packet to it which was only 5 calories with no sodium or sugar.

After this I'll be doing 1 mile, some wall pushups and some ab exercises for my activity today.

I'm still really tired and will try to blog better tomorrow. I will be working on a vlog tonight so check my youtube channel later.

modifying plan

So I got this Walk away the pounds book at the library and decided to mostly follow the plan inside for exercise. I will just be doing the walks she says to on each day and then doing whatever else I want to do. There are 42 days in all and I will be starting tomorrow. I would finish this on May 10th and would then start C25K on May 11th which is 10 days late but I would have a good reason to delay the start.

Not much to really say today. I have to work again and I'm exhausted.

Questionnaire

I read a blog by a fellow twitter person where she answered a questionnaire given by a woman named Jean Fain before she agrees to take on clients. I think she is a hypnotherapist and not a trainer. I thought they were great questions and thought I would try to answer them for myself and thought my blog was a great way to share the answers.

1. Where do you get your energy from? What are you passionate about?

Unfortunately I don't tend to have much energy. I can get energized by things such as a great workout or something good to eat. I am noticing an increase in energy with exercise.

I am passionate about so many things. One of the things I am most passionate about are gay rights. I am horrified by how people can treat other people and would love to see a more unified world in my lifetime regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, handicap, religion. It's sad how hateful people are.

2. Think back to the last time you were comfortable in your own skin. What was different about that time (attitudes, beliefs, behaviors, mood, energy, passion)?

The last time I was comfortable in my own skin was about 8 years ago. I was 22 and single and confident because I knew I had a reason to feel good about myself. I wasn't actively exercising but I was very busy and active, going hiking in the woods, waiting tables and going dancing. I had a lot of friends who were always around and I had incredible amounts of energy.

3. What is your ideal weight (even if it seems unlikely)? Your desired weight (the weight you think you could probably achieve)? Your tolerable weight (the highest weight you could live with, even if you might be disappointed)?

My ideal weight is 145 to 150, which I think is the best weight for my frame. I think I will achieve this. I could tolerate weighing 160 as at 160 I didn't look bad I was just soft so if I could accomplish a toned 160 I would be completely satisfied. I have put a lot of thought into this and know what I want in terms of my goal weights.

4. How did you come up with your desired weight? Why do you want to weigh this specific weight?

In high school I weighed 135 pounds. I thought I looked fantastic and maybe I did back then but looking back on pictures of myself I was incredibly skinny and have no desire to be that thin again. That was a girl's body and I now have a woman's body, complete with hips and breasts. I chose my desired weight because it's a midway point between where I was first unhappy with my body and where I was satisfied and I think if I were tone and fit I could look a lot better than I did when I thought I was hot shit.

5.
●How achievable is your desired weight?
Anything is achievable if you work hard enough. I definitely plan to work hard enough.

●When were you last at your desired weight?
I was last there a bit less than 3 years ago.

●How hard do you think it would be to stay at this weight?
I do not think so. I think once I reach that stage my dietary changes

●Would your tolerable weight offer the same benefits?
Yes it would. I am already at increased risk for diabetes and being an overweight woman puts me at risk for all kinds of lovely health issues and I want to live a long and healthy life so getting myself. I would be bordering right at the overweight range but I'd be a hell of a lot healthier than I am now.



6. How would your life differ if you reached your desired weight? What could you do that you can’t do now?
My life would differ because I think I would snore less, sleep better and I would be more mobile and flexible. Getting in shape would help to decrease my body aches and pain from fibromyalgia and so I am hopeful getting my body into great shape would help put my fibro into remission.

7. What things that you don’t do now because of your weight might you be able to start doing sooner than later?
I would dress in better clothing, not Eric's reject tshirts that are baggy on me but hide the fact that I look pregnant with my big gut. I would also jog and not feel self-conscious. I would also go swimming in public without hiding.

8. What obstacles are in the way of eating healthfully, losing weight?
The biggest obstacle in my way has been me for the last 3 years. I self-sabotage by snacking late and eating too many chips. It doesn't help that I'm not a great cook but am a fantastic baker. I'm working much harder now. I've been forcing myself to exercise and tonight will be trying 30 day shred for the first time.

9. Of these obstacles, which need attention immediately? Which are a lower priority and can be attended to over time? What are some ways around the highest priority obstacle?
All of these should become high priority. Tomorrow I am challenging myself to drink nothing but water all day for a week except for 1 cup of milk with dinner. I am debating 1 cup of tea with breakfast but think I shouldn't do that either. I just need to start making me a much higher priority.

10. What are opportunities to take better care of yourself and energize/impassion yourself that you are currently not making the most or anything of? Which could you begin to take advantage of today? This week? This month? List three such opportunities/activities you will take advantage of in the next 90 days.
I have a gym membership that rarely gets used. I also have a treadmill and a few other pieces of exercise equipment in my basement. This week I will use my gym membership 2 times at least. I will utilize the workout videos at the library and use my wii fit at least 4 days a week to do the yoga. Starting May 1st I will be utilizing the Couch to 5k program with Eric and possibly Amanda and Blake.

diet

I thought it would be good to blog about why I am not going to do a real diet. I would like to lose weight by modifying my current dietary habits. I am not a poor eater just a bit of an overeater. I like good food and so do the people I live with. I do want to try healthier but I cannot follow a diet like Atkins or South Beach. I have a big household and so I cannot put them on a diet with me nor can I afford to go on a diet and feed them too. Therefore adding in healthy recipes to the meal plan and picking up healthier snacks and being mindful of portion size is what will be best for us as a family.

I now have to edit my vlog which you can find at http://www.youtube.com/user/nessapaige